Author: rchen168

  • Patience in a World of Instant Gratification

    Patience in a World of Instant Gratification

    Patience is one of the hardest things to find in modern society. With all these technological advances, we’ve gotten used to having everything at our fingertips. Food cooked in minutes, deliveries in less than an hour, and information at the speed of light. And now we even have AI fast-tracking nearly every part of our personal lives and society.

    But growing up, it wasn’t like this. I had to wait for everything. If I wanted to watch the next episode of my favorite show, I had to wait an entire week. If I needed something, I had to actually go out to the store. Every task seemed to take forever because the tools and shortcuts we take for granted today just didn’t exist.

    Now, I catch myself getting frustrated if something isn’t resolved instantly. My son does the same—he wants things at short notice, and he can’t even sit through an entire show anymore. He just skips from one YouTube short to the next, rarely finishing even half a video.

    And honestly, I can relate. I want my information fast. I lean on ChatGPT to speed up my research (yes, guilty as charged). I adjust the playback speed of videos and podcasts to the max just to save time. I even hesitate to order something online if it’s going to take longer than two days—thank you, Amazon Prime, for spoiling us.

    But deep down, I know this isn’t how life is supposed to be. Growth takes time. Real transformation—whether it’s reinventing yourself, developing your mindset, or building character—doesn’t happen overnight. It’s not a quick delivery. It’s a lifelong journey.

    So when you feel yourself wanting to fast-forward to the finish line, slow your mind down. Take a breath. Watch Adam Sandler’s movie Click if you need a reminder of what happens when you rush through life. (Spoiler alert: it doesn’t end well.)

    There’s truth in that old saying: “Stop and smell the roses.” The journey itself is what shapes you. The experiences, the waiting, the little struggles—they’re what make the victories sweeter.

    Patience may feel like an outdated virtue in a world of instant gratification, but it’s still one of the most powerful lessons we can learn. Slow down, enjoy the process, and remember: the best things in life rarely come with same-day delivery.

  • Ambition vs. Greed: Learning Where to Draw the Line

    Ambition vs. Greed: Learning Where to Draw the Line

    Ambition is not greed. Motivation is not greed. Drive is not greed.

    Greed is when you want more even though you already have more than enough. It’s holding onto the excess for yourself alone. Ambition, on the other hand, starts as neutral—it can be turned toward good or twisted into something harmful depending on how you use it.

    It’s human nature to want more. But the way we handle the “extra” determines whether it becomes a blessing or a curse.

    Take food, for example. As a kid, I always wanted endless snacks and candy. And of course, I ate them all myself—until I couldn’t move or my stomach hurt. Fast-forward to adulthood, and some things don’t change. I still sometimes eat until I slip into a food coma, bursting at the seams like I just challenged a buffet to a duel—and lost. That innocent desire for food becomes greed when it leads to gluttony, poor health, and wasted meals.

    But here’s the thing—food itself isn’t bad. Eating is necessary. Buffets and unlimited specials aren’t evil. The problem is when our natural desire turns into overindulgence. Some businesses even take excess food and put it to good use—donating it or selling it at a discount so less goes to waste. That’s ambition and abundance redirected for the greater good.

    The same applies to ambition in life. Your drive, motivation, and determination can take you places you never imagined. They can help you provide for your family, achieve success, and reach new heights. But there will come a point when your ambition outpaces your needs. That’s the real test. Will you use it only for yourself, or will you share the wealth?

    As a believer, I know God provides what we need. Sometimes His blessings match what we want, but often He gives us what we truly require. And when we prove we can handle more, He entrusts us with greater abundance. But “handling it well” doesn’t just mean balancing a checkbook—it means learning how to use the overflow for good.

    We all need to learn how to walk the fine line between ambition and greed. Wanting more in life is good. Wanting success is admirable. Wanting to provide for your family is honorable. But unchecked, ambition can tip over into greed, gluttony, and selfishness.

    So don’t fear ambition, drive, or success. Don’t run from money or opportunities. Just remember to stay grounded. Know who you are, and remember where you stand when you arrive at the top.

    Ambition isn’t the enemy—forgetting your values is.

  • Finding Your True North: Breaking Free from “Do Not” Thinking

    Finding Your True North: Breaking Free from “Do Not” Thinking

    Habits of the mind are trained and developed from a very young age. Looking back, I can see the bad habits I formed as a kid—habits that made me comfortable and gave me excuses to avoid doing hard things. It was always easier to say “no” when I had a justification.

    Now, as a parent, I get to watch my son navigate his world. He’s on the spectrum, and while he has his likes and dislikes like any kid, sometimes I see something in him that I lack. When he’s working alongside other kids, many of them focus on what they don’t want to do, what they can get away with skipping, or what they can avoid. But my son? Sometimes he gets so laser-focused on the prize—whether it’s a toy or a reward—that nothing else matters. He powers through the “I don’t want to” feelings, the “I can’t” doubts, and even the “I’m too tired” moments. He just really wants it, so he keeps going.

    Then I look at myself. I don’t have the same excuse of being a child, yet as an adult, I find myself fixating on what I can’t do, what I’m scared of, or what I’m “too good” or “too tired” to attempt. Why can’t I tune it all out and chase the prize the same way my son does?

    Growing up, I heard a lot more about what I should stop doing than what I should keep doing. I was trained to focus on what I wasn’t supposed to do, what I couldn’t do, and what I was incapable of doing. Sure, I also heard the “shoulds” and “musts,” but the ratio of “don’ts” to “dos” was way out of balance.

    And I think that’s not just my story—that’s society. From parents to teachers to peers, we’re constantly warned, corrected, and guided by “don’ts.” Step outside society’s guidelines, and the punishment is often subtle but painful: being ignored, excluded, or pushed out of your circle. That fear of rejection can be more powerful than any punishment a parent could hand down.

    Of course, there’s value in following moral and ethical boundaries. But when it comes to your mindset, ambition, motivation, and drive, society’s overemphasis on the “don’ts” can steer you away from your true path. Instead of following the direction God has laid out for you—or the compass in your own heart—you start following the crowd. You doubt yourself. You conform instead of walking your unique journey.

    To keep moving forward, you need to recalibrate your compass to your true north. Not the one handed to you by peers, parents, or social media, but the one aligned with your authentic self and, if you’re spiritual like me, with God’s purpose for you. Don’t let others steer you off course.

    Life’s fog will always roll in, but if you keep your eyes on your own north star, you’ll never be lost.

  • Flipping the Script: From Frustration to Acceptance

    Flipping the Script: From Frustration to Acceptance

    When things don’t go my way, I’ll be honest—I just want to punch the wall and go full Hulk mode.
    You ever feel that way too?

    Take this example: you’re trying to get car insurance, and the insurance company makes it harder than solving a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded. You email underwriting three times, carefully explaining the problem, and what do you get back? The same cookie-cutter response every time. Thanks, Progressive.

    And then, to top it off, the customer service rep basically tells you your problem isn’t their problem. That’s the corporate version of: we don’t negotiate, we don’t care. Imagine sitting at a restaurant and the waiter says, “We don’t care about your food preferences, and we care even less about your satisfaction.” Not exactly five-star service. Thanks again, Investing Daily.

    Okay, maybe I sound a little bitter. Maybe I am. But honestly, this kind of situation is universal.
    Life doesn’t always cooperate.

    It could be a test that didn’t go well.
    A job interview that tanked.
    A date that crashed and burned.
    Or your team losing the game.

    Every day, something goes sideways. We set an expectation, reality doesn’t match it, and frustration follows. Then what happens? We lash out. We blame others. Or worse—we take it out on the people around us. And yes, I’m guilty of all of the above.

    This is where I have to practice what I preach. Accept the circumstances. Accept the results. It may not be what I wanted, but maybe—just maybe—it happened for a reason.

    Other times, it’s simply reality. I’ve got to face the issue, do the task I don’t want to do, and keep moving. That’s life.

    Now, here’s the twist: sometimes it’s not even the other person’s fault. That customer service rep? They’re just following policy. Their hands are tied. It wasn’t their intention to make my day harder. Misunderstandings happen. Mistakes get made.

    Of course, we still get emotional. But when frustration hits, that’s when we need to step back. Take a deep breath. Remind ourselves—it’s not personal.

    One of the best strategies? Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. If you were them, with the same restrictions, maybe you’d respond the same way too.

    At the end of the day, getting angry doesn’t solve the issue. Just like crying doesn’t get you out of that unwanted task, anger doesn’t magically fix the situation either.

    So here’s the mindset shift: flip the switch. Look at the glass half full. Choose positivity.

    Because frustration is temporary—but the way you respond can shape your future.

  • Crying Won’t Do It—Facing Life’s Unwanted Tasks

    Crying Won’t Do It—Facing Life’s Unwanted Tasks

    Does that thought ever pop into your mind?
    The one that whispers: I’m too old for this. Too good for this. Too rich for this.

    Well, here’s the hard truth—you’re not.

    When I was a kid, there were plenty of things I didn’t want to do. I didn’t like reading. I didn’t want to practice the violin. And waking up early for Chinese school on Saturday mornings? Forget it. But at the end of the day, I still had to do them—at least enough to get by.

    Now that I’m a dad, I hear the same soundtrack playing through my son’s complaints. He doesn’t want to go to school. He doesn’t want to do homework. He doesn’t want to get ready for bed or eat his vegetables. The cycle continues.

    And let’s be real—it doesn’t magically disappear when you grow up. Adults have their own list: pay bills, pay taxes, wake up for work, clean the house. Some tasks never change, no matter your age.

    Then there are the big ones—the things no one wants to face: illness, injury, emotional trauma, loss. Life throws these at us whether we’re ready or not. And unlike those little tasks, you can’t outsource or ignore them forever.

    Sure, money and resources might soften some blows. You can hire a maid, a nanny, a tutor, or even a mechanic to deal with the small stuff. You can prolong certain things with treatments, trainers, or quick fixes. But sooner or later, life catches up. No amount of money, status, or friends can buy you an escape from pain, loss, or heartbreak.

    Remember the Final Destination movies? You can run all you want, but destiny catches up. Life works the same way.

    So at some point, you have to turn around and face it. Crying, complaining, or avoiding won’t get you off the hook. I tell my son this all the time: “Crying doesn’t get you out of homework. By the time you’re done crying, you could’ve already finished it.”

    And honestly, that applies to all of us. The energy we waste avoiding reality could’ve been spent overcoming it.

    Even with life’s hardest challenges—the ones that leave you grieving, shaken, or broken—you still have the capacity to move forward. Yes, mourn if you need to. Get help when it feels overwhelming. But eventually, you have to accept reality, stand up, and take the next step.

    Because at the end of the day, we all have the ability to get through what’s in front of us. Some may have more resources than others, but every single one of us has the inner strength to face life’s unwanted tasks—whether big or small.

    So don’t cry about it. Don’t avoid it. Just do it. Because life isn’t waiting—and neither should you.